Cold Water

I love to drink cold water when it's hot out or when I'm exercising.

Oh yes, then, there's nothing better.

I don't, however, like cold water when I have to put my entire body in it.

For example, in Lake Superior.

See, Lake Superior is huge. And I've grown up next to it all my life, and it's pretty, and it's great to go sit on the beaches of Lake Superior and read a book.

But put your foot in it, and you may get frostbite.

Sometimes it's really hot out, like 90 degrees, and there's nothing to cool off in, because there are no township pools around and I'm sure as heck not going to jump in a lake that has had 52 degrees as its record high water temperature.

So I don't. Which is fine.

But sometimes, people insist on throwing this freezing cold water at me. Some people will do it on purpose, while sometimes it's just caused by kids running by and splashing when I'm wading in it. But it annoys me.

I love the ocean, because it's always warm. Sometimes even hot. And to me, that's the way to go for swimming.

Speaking of swimming, I also hate cold water when it's in swimming pools. If you advertise a "heated pool," please, by all means, make sure it's heated. Because, I swear, I've sometimes swam in pools just as cold as that aforementioned, gigantic, lake.

But what is the absolute worst thing about cold water?

That sometimes, cold water ends up in my shower.

And this, I swear to you, is the worst thing that could ever possibly happen.

In my first apartment ever, I woke up the first day, hopped in the shower, and was greeted by FREEZING COLD WATER pelting down on me. So, of course, doing what any normal person would do, I jumped right back out of the shower, wrapped myself in my towel, and cursed under my breath.

And it continued like this for a few days afterward. But what could I do about it? Nothing. So I dealt with it, and was probably grumpy those few mornings.

The other bad thing about shower water is when it turns cold without warning. For example, I'll be enjoying a nice hot shower, and all of a sudden, I'll have mounds of shampoo in my hair, and the water will turn cold.

And I don't really have the option to jump out, then, because there's shampoo all over my head! So I have no choice but to finish my shower in the ice water. And skip the conditioner.

Sometimes this happens to me at hotels. And it's then that I wonder, "Dear hotel, why wouldn't you have a hot water heater large enough for your 150 rooms?" And then wish I had not stayed there.

Because there is possibly nothing more annoying in the world than cold shower water.